This article serves as a short guide to proper etiquette when meeting or dating a Polish woman for the first time. It may also be helpful for those visiting Poland or interacting with Polish friends. To learn more about Polish customs, check out related articles like “Poles and Their Unique Cultural Charm” or “Intercultural Relationships in Poland” in our “Dating Poles” section.
Polish women are often perceived as elegant, stylish, and feminine. Many men from various countries express curiosity about how to make a good impression on a Polish woman. You may also find our articles on “Polish Weddings and Family Traditions” insightful for understanding the values held by Polish women. Here are some practical tips:
First and foremost, it’s essential to display courteous behavior. Polish men are typically very polite, holding doors open and letting women go first when entering or exiting places like restaurants, stores, or cars. In casual settings, people may greet each other with a kiss on each cheek, but avoid this on the first meeting with a Polish woman, as it may seem too forward. An old-fashioned gesture, like a kiss on the hand, was once popular but is now usually reserved for elderly women as a sign of respect. Only attempt this if you’re confident in the gesture’s execution.
Polish men often offer to help with carrying heavy bags or suitcases. When I arrived at Kraków Airport, at least two men immediately offered to help with my luggage—a refreshing contrast to the norms in the U.S., where “equality” can sometimes mean a lack of such gestures. If you’re a foreign woman in Poland and a man offers to assist, it’s usually a kind gesture, but exercise caution as, occasionally, it could be a ploy by someone hoping for a tip or other benefit.
If you want to make a great first impression, bring a fresh flower for your date. Flowers are common in Poland for special occasions like birthdays and celebrations. If you’re visiting a Polish household, it’s customary to bring a small gift, such as flowers for the hostess or an elegant bottle of alcohol for the host. Flowers are available year-round in Poland, especially at local markets, so be sure to pick up a bouquet unless it's winter and they’re hard to find.
When dining out, try to show a bit of elegance—ask what she’d like to order, let her take her seat first, and pour her drink before yours. Don’t push her to drink more than she’s comfortable with, and avoid drinking too much yourself; overindulgence can create a poor impression. Polish men are mindful of their alcohol intake, especially on a first date, as alcoholism has historically been a social issue in the country. Show genuine interest in her opinions and listen to her—having a good sense of humor helps break the ice, but avoid boasting about your achievements too much. Instead, aim to show kindness, intelligence, and attentiveness. For example, if she’s cold after leaving the restaurant, offer her your jacket.
Plan to cover the bill at the restaurant or movie theater, especially for the first date. In Poland, splitting the bill is less common; typically, the one who invites will pay, and in most cases, it’s expected that a man covers the expenses.
Polish women are often skilled cooks (though younger generations may still be learning). If you’re invited to her home for a meal, bring a flower to show your appreciation, and be sure to compliment her cooking. If you can prepare a meal for her at some point, it will be a pleasant surprise.
Learning a few Polish phrases can also impress her. Here are some basics:
"thank you"="dziękuję" (djen-koo-yeh)
"good morning"="dzień dobry" (djen dobri)
"goodbye"="do widzenia" (do veed-zen-ya)
"see you tomorrow"="do jutra" (do you-tra)
"please/here you go"="proszę" (pro-sheh)
"I love you"="kocham cię" (ko-ham che)
Personal space is also essential to keep in mind. Like many Europeans, Polish people value a comfortable distance during conversations. Keep about an arm’s length distance, unless you’re dancing or holding hands. Avoid intense eye contact, as it may feel intrusive. Instead, be a friendly observer, giving her enough space to feel at ease.
One final piece of advice:
A Polish woman typically takes commitments seriously. Approach your relationship with respect and understanding.